Abatimycin, The Expired GEJ Publicity Drug

When Dr. Reuben Abati took up the appointment to be the Presidential spokesman, heavens wept. My Uncle buys the Guardian to read his favourite writer who he aptly named “Eleeke-eebu”. For those who do not speak Yoruba, it means “A cheek filled with Insults” Something synonymous with “A quiver full of arrows”.

This is someone who wrote (then) fearlessly and was the voice of the silent majority of Nigerians. Read some of his articles before he got invited to come and chop, and you can not but agree with the lucid expression of the simple expectations that the average citizen has of its government. Alas, he decided to mortgage his hard earned reputation for a pot of stew in the villa kitchen.

Rather than fire Abati, the President has decided to give him the opportunity to resign and go back to into the trenches. Bruised, battered and mortally wounded. The recruitment of Dr. Doyin Okupe, the bulky medical doctor turned professional political jobber (PPJ) from Ogun State is an indication that all is not well with the publicity strategy in the Villa.

Rueben Abati has come, he has seen and he has failed. How did Abatimycin fail? I wager it just lost potency and expired. Time to ask NAFDAC to withdraw the license on this drug, so that all of us keeping a bottle in our first aid boxes can just flush the expired drug down the drain.

Knowing Nigeria, Abati will pursue the three options that his ilks have used in laundering their credentials, and in this order.

      1. Abati will write a book, detailing his feeble attempt at making an impact in Government where tack is alien and roforofo is king.

      2. Abati will fraternize with the opposition to the point of annoyance, to let the ruling party know that they took the wrong decision. A political investment

      3. Abati will return to the ruling party, to recoup his investment, the same way Ikimi and Atiku came back.

The umbrella is large and will continue to shield the good, the bad, the ugly and every expired drugs!

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